I’m curious about something. Why is it that I, as an American taxpayer, should be responsible for bailing out people and companies that, in essence, screwed themselves over with stupid decisions? Make no mistake, that’s what the Bear Stearns collapse and subsequent bailout is. They banked on — no pun intended — and likely precipitated the subprime mortgage phenomenon and then for all practical purposes got a margin call by everybody. Hey lookie! You’ve got no assets and astounding debt!

So, the Fed is possibly on the hook for $30 billion in buyout for that company which means that you and I are on the hook. Because they were dumb. I follow the reasoning: they’re bailing out this company to prevent a cascade effect since Bear Stearns had so many connections with other companies. I can’t help but be irked that I’m funding utter stupidity, though.

Similarly, the Democratic Presidential candidates both want to provide “assistance to those in mortgage crises” to the tune of another $10 to $30 billion dollars. This is a bailout for people who did the math on that $750,000 house on their $30,000 salary and said “we can swing it!” I can’t swing a 3/4 million dollar house and I make more than that. So I didn’t buy a 3/4 million dollar house. Why am I bailing out people who simply overspent and screwed themselves? I understand the desire to help the less fortunate and those who are truly in financial despair, but not those who brought it on themselves buying things that they had no possibility of ever really affording.

Apparently, a lot of Muslims are angry about some comics depicting their prophet. This is obviously impetus enough to storm and torch embassies, hurl firebombs at peacekeeping forces, and basically act a fool.

I understand being offended. I’m sure there are things I’d find offensive if depicted in a comic. I understand being angry. But, so sorry, nothing gives anyone license to go on a rioting spree. Certainly not a drawing. You couldn’t draw something offensive enough to warrant me taking to the streets looking for someone to hit.

This is more proof in my mind of a theory of civilization I have. I think we’re one step up from total chaos at any particular time. The only thing that separates individual communities or civilizations is how far it takes to bridge that step. For these Muslims on the rampage, it was a comic. For a bunch of dumb assholes in California, it was an unpopular verdict for a trial. For a bunch of dumb assholes in Louisiana, it was a hurricane. For a bunch of dumb assholes in Vancouver, it was a cancelled Guns N’ Roses concert. Oh for several of those you could argue that it was a symptom of a larger problem, a boiling over of decades or centuries or millennia of tensions… whatever.

Horseshit. Oh, I don’t deny those tensions exist — well, except for the GNR concert riots… those were just idiotic white boys gone apeshit — but I reiterate that nothing gives anyone license to go berserk and kill, maim, or destroy. At that point you’re merely wallowing in excess, secure in the knowledge that, as one of many, you’re unlikely to be singled out for retribution.

So, these particular Muslims would have to forgive me if I look at them as ignorant savages. Not all Muslims, just the ones out doing what they shouldn’t be in any civilized society. Just like I don’t point the finger at everyone in Los Angeles for the King riots or at everyone in New Orleans for the post-Katrina lawlessness, or at everyone in Vancouver. Just the morons.

Everyone has their limit. Some people should reconsider theirs.

1925-2005

Some of my earliest TV memories are staying up late, secretly, and watching Johnny Carson on The Late Show. This was my treat. I’d stifle giggles so my parents couldn’t hear me and take my treat away. I didn’t know why I liked Johnny Carson, I just knew that he made me laugh. A lot of the humor was over my head — I was no older than about 7 or 8 when I first saw him after all — but much of it was universal: that classic peek at the camera, rocking forward onto his tiptoes and glancing over towards Doc when he sprung a particularly good one, his effortless ease at popping just the right one-liner at just the right time.

Thanks Johnny.

For those of you who wonder why women tend to outlive men. My personal favorite from the site has to be this one.

Metal ladder? Check. Barefoot? Check. Water? Check. Power tool? Check. But damn it, he has his safety goggles on.

Finally, someone is launching an investigation into that patently obscene millisecond shot of Janet Jackson’s mostly-obscured nipple during the Super Bowl. I’m so glad that someone is thinking of the irreparable harm that this brief pseudo-nudity caused.

Oh! Did anyone catch that CSI episode where the dog carries home a decapitated human head, and the dog got sick because it ate part of the head?! That was awesome!

ColdForged rolls his eyes

Not that I’m actually bitching about CSI — my favorite show on TV these days — but you get the point. It’s amazing this country produces anything but serial killers, rapists, and the sexually dysfunctional. Call out the National Guard! There’s a nipple on TV!